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| FEATURES Where have all the good mags gone?
I was browsing in the bookshop the other day, in search of something new and interesting to read — something lighthearted, so I delved into the magazine section. I instantly felt like I was at the fairground. A carousel of racks stacked ceiling-high with magazines covering every genre, sport, disorder and hobby known to man surrounded me. I had to sit down for a minute just to get my bearings. Eventually I stood up, slowly, as my eyes began to focus again. I wasn't quite sure what I was looking for but I was hoping it would have a fair amount of content on cars, guns and possibly some extreme sports being performed by buxom beauties wearing only bikinis. That magazine, evidently, does not exist. The next best thing I could find, after excluding scores of women's, fashion, cooking and farmer's magazines was an A4 publication consisting of 150 glossy pages of advertising. It was obviously aimed at the average Yuppie as well since there was nothing to do with anything that would put hair on my chest or get my heart racing. In fact, there were plenty of articles and products focused on just taking the hair off my chest. I felt quite depressed and left the store empty-handed. Frankly, I don't want to read a magazine that attempts to give me 127 sex tips once a month. I don't have the time or the energy to try even five of them, so I just end up feeling inadequate that I can't keep up. And as for the fashion sections... sure, the guy's in the magazines look great in their tailored Italian blazers and suede shoes, but after the cost of the magazine, I just can't quite afford the deposit on the personal loan needed for those clothes. The best part, though, of these new-age man magazines is the recipe sections. I don't even know what coriander looks like, let alone how to chop it. A monthly supplement that reviewed the latest firelighters and charcoal would do me just fine. A lemon and salt marinade over my lamb chops is all I need. I heard the other day that almost as many women read these so-called "men's" magazines as men do. No wonder, the beauty tips look amazing — and the only thing missing is a free gift of a moisturiser on the cover. Sorry, I take that back, I didn't check the October issue yet. I have been trying to not see this as a bad thing, but rather as a business opportunity. Why hasn't a decent men's mag been published yet? But wait, hasn't it always been like this? As far back as I can remember, there hasn't been a decent MAN'S magazine. Sure, we used to have Scope but the only excitement there was trying to find a misplaced star and hopefully catch a tiny glimpse of a nipple. Maybe it is time to approach a publisher, and start a magazine filled with cars, braai techniques and power tool reviews. They could even include a free drill bit on the cover of the first issue to get sales going. | ||